Bring Lawyers, Thugs, and Money

We are bombarded daily with bad news. Alarms are ringing practically everywhere. More and more people are chiming in. What do most Americans do? They shoot the messenger and return to their bocce games in the park. Meanwhile the soothing strains of CNN saturate all public spaces. “Don’t upset yourself. Here, take another pill.”

A woman (or man) in a burka is seen running across the park. She suddenly detonates. “Will you have a look at that?” A cup of fair market coffee now costs $8. “Sure we can afford it - now that we no longer drive, it’s the Ecuadorian Shoe Repair on the corner that’s become the bastard: Imagine, changing $65 to re-sole my $150 shoes!

“It’s now been the third time I’ve had to have it done – now that I no longer drive – and each time the price goes up by 20 bucks. He only accepts cash. I doubt he even pays taxes. But even he’s hit hard times, I think. The last time I was in there, besides selling shoe polish and laces, he also sold cigarettes, at $3 less than the 7/11. He says he has all brands. He keeps them in the back, where he has his workshop.

“I might have gone out and bought a new pair, but none of the new shoes fit anymore – not in my price range anyway. So, I’m stuck.”

Stuck indeed! We bought Obama and now have to wait at least another four years for a chance to put him back on the shelf. Not that a Republican would have been much better. Republicans have for far too long settled for the consolation prize. They haven’t really done much by way of opposition.

We should have figured it out when we found Congressman William J. Jefferson co-opting military resources in the aftermath of Katrina to bring him to his house in New Orleans, so he could check on money he kept in his freezer. It took a natural disaster to bring Jefferson’s crime to light. Just imagine all the disasters it would take to flush out all the other Washington criminals. There wouldn’t be a tree left standing on this sad continent.

Why would anybody in their rational mind spend millions – now billions – to get themselves elected to any public office? Think about it! And why does the cost just keep going up and up? It’s got to be for a chance at the public trough.

Now look at Wisconsin. They’re not as slick as those in DC, but the nature of the game is the same. Never say die. Once you’re in, you’re in.

They hold an election and elect a governor. They give him a mandate. As soon as he tries to do anything, the opposition leaves the state and hides. The governor hangs tough. Good for him. He is a man with old-fashioned principles. Maybe he doesn’t quite understand how things are done. But we’re not yet finished. Bring in lawyers, thugs and money from outside. Then go the judicial route. They hoped to overturn the will of the people by voting in a liberal judge. But they screw this up as well - but only barely. Now they orchestrate recall elections for every legislator who might have voted the ‘wrong’ way. Eventually attrition prevails and they’ll get their way. And even the brightest among us dissolve into laughter or fold like cheap cameras, hoping to make it home in time for one more night of undisturbed sleep.

Such is the face of representative governance in America today.

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