SmackDown

No matter which side you take re Washington’s BP shakedown, there’s more than enough suspicion that the whole thing has been staged. Wrestling too was once a legitimate sport. It no longer is. This is not to say that WWE (formerly WWF) is not popular. It is.

Purists will point to modern high-profile wrestling as a sham. Those who patronize the sport agree that it’s 100% drama, theater and hype – but they are more than willing to suspend their disbelief for the duration of the show (as we all must when we go to the movies, watch television, read books, newspapers or just listen to friends either boast or complain). The slightly squeamish among us can take solace in knowing that the blood we see is fake – ketchup, which we all just adore.

Not so in the Gulf. The oil washing up on the coast is real. The birds and fish are actually dying. These are the actors who are facing a real existential threat. Suspended dividend payments to retired BP share holders who will now have to cut back on medicines and cold weather jaunts to tropical climes are real as well. They may yet be willing to forgo their loss and see it simply as the price of admission. As in professional wrestling, however, they will be asked to suspend their disbelief for the duration.

The news out of Washington does not get better. Last week we were told that, due to unforeseen circumstances, health care costs - far from declining - will actually increase; that, no, you will not be able to keep your insurance provider or doctor. What else haven’t we been told? Every week the estimated damage from the oil spill rises. Taxes rise; job creation continues to falter.

Yet, we are told, the green valley of plenty lies just ahead. Somewhere, over the hills, the drums of war are beating. Israel, Kyrgyzstan, the Koreas are on the brink. Fake blood? Fake oil? Lies? (Spoonfuls of sugar help the medicine go down.) …and, don’t forget, fake money to salve any wound that doesn’t kill outright.

Enjoy your SmackDown, America. You paid for it.